“Baste me in butter and call me Slappy!” Welcome to the World of British Personal Ads Where Drippy Sentiments Need not Apply. FASHIONTRIBES POP CULTURE BLOG

   
(Some of the more colorful personal ads showcased by David Rose of the London Review of Books; photos: Jonathan Player for The New York Times)

Lonely hearts accustomed to trolling the American personals tend to come across a lot of beach strolling, fine dining, 40s/50s/60s-but-looks-youngers who adore sunsets and cuddles. Across the Pond, however, openly bragging is a social no-no, and earnest displays of sentiment are deemed cringeworthy. Instead, the way to attract a mate is to present oneself as unworthy, flawed, or even downright disgusting - reports a recent article in NYTimes.com. Other prized atttributes include shallowness, flatulence, obsessiveness, incontinence, hypertensiveness, hostility, being older than 100, paranoid, pasty, plaid-wearing, sinister, on amphetamines, and even in a mental institution. Liver disease isn't off limits, nor is drug addiction, physical ailments, gambling habits, skin woes, and even a decreased sperm count. “I’ve divorced better men than you” reads one...so insults, apparently, aren't either. Nor is being a potential Fatal Attraction-type girlfriend, which notes: “Tell me I’m pretty, then watch me cling.”

After the London Review of Books started a personals column in 1998 and received ads such as “67-year-old disaffiliated flâneur picking my toothless way through the urban sprawl, self-destructive, sliding towards pathos, jacked up on Viagra and on the lookout for a contortionist who plays the trumpet," David Rose, the magazine's advertising director, knew they had a winner. He recently compiled his faves into a book:In They Call Me Naughty Lola: Personal Ads from the London Review of Books - the title drawn from the ad of a 46 year old male physicist. “It does speak of a certain arrogance," notes Kate Fox, a cultural anthropologist and author of Watching the English, ”that you have the confidence and the sense of humor to say these things." (via NYTimes.com - book available at Amazon.com)

- Lesley Scott

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